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Scientology Myths - what is fact? what is fiction?
chapter: Squirrels

Q:What is a "squirrel"?

From the blog:

Marty RathbunThis morning I was pointed to a rather funny video of several self-proclaimed “SquirrelBusters”. By the looks of it it’s a prank but I thought no one should be left with a question what a “Squirrel” is. And I don’t mean those flat pieces of bloody fur you sometimes see on high-traffic roads, no, I am talking about the definition of a Scientology squirrel. As Scientology is built on the findings and teachings of L. Ron Hubbard it might be best to show what he said about them:

You know what a squirrel is?  A squirrel is somebody — you know, the medical profession since time immemorial and all these various professions have had on their coattails, squirrels.  Every one of them.  There hasn’t been a single branch of human endeavor that doesn’t have its lunatic fringe.  (L. Ron Hubbard, 5 December 1952, Lecture “ARC/Cycles: Theory and Automaticity)

Although we’ve had other definitions for a squirrel, that’s the one I commonly use to myself. A squirrel is somebody who runs round and round and round the cage of his own bank. (L. Ron Hubbard, 23 November 1956, Lecture: “Farewell Lecture”)

A squirrel is a person — a person who’s going around looking for nuts that are foolish enough to let him process them.  (L. Ron Hubbard, 6 April 1959, Lecture: “Beingness and Communication”)

But why would Scientologists be so concerned with  them? It’s for the protection of people. Maybe this one explains it best:

Here is the guy who plans to “squirrel” and “grab Scientology.” Here is the boy.  Or here is the girl.  But here is also a thetan buried in the mud.  And if you let this person go without attention, he or she will soon become ill or die — or worse will mess up or kill others.  The person is the only real psycho.  And if you let him drift he’ll soon wind up in the brain surgeon’s suppressive hands.  So it’s nothing to overlook.  People who have to solve their problems by shooting the rest of us down are what made life such a hell in this universe. You have your hands on the implanter, the warmonger, the wrecker. (L. Ron Hubbard, Policy Letter of 5 April 1965, titled “The No-Case-Gain Student”)

Update 23 April 2011: I found another great quote. Dependent in your involvement with Scientology you might know that there is the Religious Technology Center (RTC), an organization devoted to keeping Scientology teachings unaltered and applied as intended. Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard says about the RTC in 1983:

"My earnest advice is: Only deal with or associate with those organizations licensed by RTC and auditors in good standing with the Church; close your ears to false statements made by bad hats and thus really clear the planet." (Ron's Journal 38, "Today and Tomorrow: The Proof" released on New Year's Eve 1983)

External link: More information about squirrels by Lars Najbjerg